So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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