Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
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