Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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