Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize