My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
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