You're earring is so big in my mouth
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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