Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
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as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
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Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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