For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
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We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
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He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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