Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
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There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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