omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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