apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize