dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize