dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Two words: nipple clamps
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