Christians are straight up FREAKS
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize