What did we do last night that was yellow?
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I currently don't understand fingers.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize