cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize