I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
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