pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
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Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
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Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
and you fell through a lawn chair
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