College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
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