the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
i will never coherently bang her
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You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
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I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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