help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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