Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
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Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
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I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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