I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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