She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
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we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
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He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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