If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
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