i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
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Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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