Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize