You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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