Define "chronic" masturbator.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Semen is not good for contacts.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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