....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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