she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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