508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize