my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
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