We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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