In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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