Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
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