Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize