You're completely useless in the revolution.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize