One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
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