Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize