At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I'm having to shit out rocks
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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