**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize