google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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