Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
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I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
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The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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