those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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