my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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