I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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