once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
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