I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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