just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
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